Chapter 2

Arriving, I looked up in distaste. The parts of the building were falling apart and the paint was peeling off the walls. It was hardly safe but it was the only place I could afford at the moment. We paid for a couple nights and made our way up to our room when Estella said she was hungry.

Ordering some pasta to eat, I scrunched up my nose when it finally arrived. The smell of the sauce was awful and the pasta was stone cold and they tried to (not so cleverly) hide some mould with the sauce. I nibbled some and had to spit it out straight away.

I searched through my bag finding two chocolate bars that I packed earlier on. I gave them both to Estella knowing how hungry she was.

"What about you, Jay?" She asked, seeing that I had nothing to eat.
"It's okay, I ate before we left. And there are some more invade I get hungry." I lied. My stomache quietly rumbled, knowing it hasn't been fed since yesterday lunch, curtesy of my father's punishment for me for refusing to by him some cigarettes with the little money we had left.

I put Estella to sleep and wrapped her up in extra clothes to keep her warm.

I slid down the wall, sitting on the floor as I took deep breathes. I lightly banged my forehead on my knees as I recalled what I witnessed yesterday.

I went up to Estella's room to check up on her after dad said he wanted to put her to bed. I frowned when I heard her muffled cries as I came up the stairs. My jaw dropped as I saw my father with a pillow suffocating Estella as she cried.
"I said stop fucking crying you bitch" he sneered.
"Dad!" I yelled. He quickly let go and menacingly walked towards me
"Get that bitch to shut up before I make her" he said with a threatening tone before waking off.

Tears threatened to escape my eyes. I had done the one this I sworn never to let happen. I had let Estella down, I didn't protect her like I said I would.

Sure my father has hit me plenty of times but I had never imagined for him to do it to Estella. I had stayed strong over the years of abuse. I couldn't even remember the last time I had cried but I guess it was all coming out tonight. I covered my mouth, not wanting to make a sound and wake Estella up as I let out a silent sob.

My phone buzzed grabbing my attention.
Text message from Nicky
Hey, I know it's late and we haven't spoken in ages but happy birthday xx
I checked the date: June 5th. I hadn't even realised.
Receiving that message from my high school best friend bought more tears to my eyes as I recalled how she ditched me for the popular girls and helped with their endless torture to me. A year later, they kicked her out of their friendship group over something petty and she came running back to me claiming how sorry she was for leaving.

That night, I didn't just cry for Estella, I cried for the girl who just wanted to be loved, for the girl who woke up every morning wishing she didn't, I cried for the girl who talked others out of suicide but had a hard time doing it for herself. For once, I cried for me.

I sat there for the whole night curled up in a ball painfully sobbing but not a sound came out because I didn't want anyone to see how broken and hurt I truly was.

If this is going to be how my life is going to be then I don't want it anymore. But Happy Birthday to me... I guess.