Chapter 42

Maybe I'm an addict. Maybe he's my own personal drug, my own breed of liquor. When I look at him now, in the front seat, driving, I can't help but think about jerking the wheel and colliding with the monstrous tree just ahead. It's the call of the void. It's that one split second where the real darkness within seeps out and takes over. My eyes stare at the wheel, my hand fists my shirt, then I glance off out the window.

I try to do things that are good for me, sometimes. I convince...