Chapter 8

Lydia's POV

We were sitting on the rootop of Alessa's house. Nate and River were talking to each other along with Aaron. Alessa, Julia and Em were talking about things and i was sitting and chilling.

"Should we talk things out?" Nate suddenly asked and i looked at him. I took a deep breath and nodded.

"I will go first. We are really sorry Lydia.... Aye! Alessa stop!..... Yeah so, we werent really in our mind when Blake told us about Davis and stuff. We were really shocked. We came here to confront Blake because we thought that you would be alright" she said with a sad smile.

The last part ignited anger in me. "So at last you guys fucking thought that i would do it..... Dont deny it. Didnt you guys fucking know that i loved him. I literally loved him. Did you guys know how fucking hard it was to look at him when i told him those fucking words!" I sobbed.

"He looked so hurt, so broken! That day was supposed to be fucking perfect. Do you guys know that he took me to the same park the day before our anniversary! You guys dont understand how it fucking felt" i said and broke down into uncontrollable sobs.

"You could have told me. I could habe helped you" Julia said softly and i looked at her.

"He fucking warned me not to tell, Julia. He was stalikng you, mom and dad. I would have told you guys if i would have not been warned. I fucking loathe him! I hate Davis. He ruined my life! It is so hard for me to look at Blake's pictures with different girls every week" i was crying hysterically.

I had never cried so hard before. It made me feel really pathetic. My life is so fucking pathetuc and i had not realised it until now.

"Davis is dead" a voice stated and i looked at Nate. "What?" I croaked out. "He is dead. We killed him" River stated and i gasped.

"Why?" I asked him and he frowned. "He fucking ruined your life Lydia" Aaron piped in and i frowned.

"Noone deserved to die...nif if he ruined my life there might be someone who loves him" i said and River got angry.

"He fucking raped almost half of the girls he dated Lydia! Didnt you know that?" He exclamed and my heart dropped.

It was too much information to take in.

He raped girls? Who the fuck does that?

"He deserves to die then" Em stated and i looked at her. I was starting to feel giddy.

"Excuse me guys. This is too much to take in. I would be back in a minute" i excused myself and went to the bathroom.

I started crying again, pathetically. Why am i feeling so damn weak all of a sudden? I have not cried like this in a long time.

After a while i took two deep breaths, washed my face and went out of bathroom. I saw Blake coming up the stairs.

My heart went warm and started beating at an incredible pace.

He looked at me. He kept looking at me for a while, staring at me with a frown. I frowned back and he shook his head and went to his room.

Back to ignoring me....

I shook my head too and went back on the rooftop. Everyone was engaged in conversation. Noone even saw me coming.

I sat alone, in silence and looked at the stars. There were too many stars. I didnt even notice them before.

"Hey Lyd" i heard Aaron say from behing me and i jumped because he came suddenly. I turned to glare at him.

"Are you glaring at me?" He asked. "No i am looking at you with a lot of damn love" i said sarcastically and lokked up at sky again.

"And here i was, trying to be nice" he grumbled under his breath and came to sit next to me.

"So, how are you and Em going on?" I asked and he smiled. "We are going good. She is so damn cute. How does she manage to be so cute?" He said and sighed.

"You look like a love sick, cute puppy" i said and pulled his cheecks.

He looked so cute and so in love with Em. Em is so damn lucky to have my brother.

Blake's POV

I was sitting in my room constantly thinking about her.

Lydia.

I want her so bad. The way she was looking at me was hurting me. She wanted me but i am not ready to date anyone again.

Taking over Parker Enterprise and studying at the same time is really hard for me. I want to show my dad that i am capable of taking over the business.

Dating Lydia again would not work for me. She stays in Sydney now. If she would come back, then maybe i would date her.

But I guess its better for both of us that we don't date now. She is studying and has a career ahead.

What if she leaves me again?

Also, i have become a horrible person now. She is still pure. I dont want to ruin her life.

It would be better for us if we date. Maybe i could become just friends with her. It wont ruin anything in anyway.

I still love her. As much as i have tried to get her out my mind, it seems impossible to do that when is here.

Whenever i see her, my heart beats at an incredible pace.

As much as i want to kiss her, i dont want to ruin her life. I am not good for her. Maybe she deserves much better.

I stress a lot these days and only girls could take away my stress. Everytime i am doing the deed with a girl, i think about Lydia.

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on he door. I opened the door to see Em, Lydia's new bestfriend.

"Hi" she said in a soft voice with a warm smile. I smiled back. "Hi... how can i help you?" I asked her, clearly comfused.

"I want to talk to you" she said and i knew what was coming. "Come in" i said with a warm smile and she came in my room.

She sat on the bed while i stood, leaning on the doorframe. "I know what happened between you and Lydia" she said and i let out a sigh.

"I figured" i said and motioned her to continue. "I know you still like but i dont know why are you inoring her. You both love eachother. And you know that it wasnt her fault that she had to leave you guys" she said with a frown.

"Its not that i dont love her. I do. I wont deny it. But i guess i am not ready for another relationship. All the buisness and studies are already stressing me out. The only way to overcome alk the stress for me is girls. I am not good for Lydia. You guys need to understand that" i said honestly and her frown deepened.

"Its okay. I understand" she said, disappointment lacing her voice. "But, i can be friends with her. I wont date her. I could talk to her like you guys do. But wont date her. It is already too much for me"I said and she sighed.

"Okay. Thats good" she said and we talked a little more.

***

Lydia's POV

I was thirsty. We were still up at night. I went to the kitchen and i totally regretted my decision. Blake was sitting on an island chair.

I didnt want to make it awkward. So, i ignored him and went to the refrigerator straight. I took out OJ and took a glass from the cabinet.

I could feel his eyes on me the whole time and my hear beat was fast. I was going to leave when he stopped me. "Lydia" he called me and i stopped on my tracks.

I gathered courage and faced him. "Yes?" I asked him and he sighed. "We need to talk" he said and i sighed.

I sat 1 chair away from him. "I am listening" i said, not looking at him. "You know that we cant date again" he said and my heart dropped.

"Its you who wants to complicate things" i said after a while of silence. "I am not ready for another relantionship" he stated firmly.

My heart clenched. It hurts so much. The way he said it, with no emotion makes me think that did he ever love me?

"I saw that on your instagram" i stated coldly and glared at him. He glared back at me. "Here i am, wanting to talk to you and you are becoming a bitch to me" he said, disbelief evident on his face.

"Its not me who is becoming a bitch! You were an asshole the whole fucking time!" I exclaimed and he pinched the bridge of his nose, annoyed.

"Stop behaving like a fucking child and listen to me for fuck's sake. I dont want to be in a relationship because i am stressing a lot right now. Only girls take my stress away. I dont want to hurt you by dating you amd doing other things behind your back. Just beacuse i am not dating you doesnt mean that i dont fucking care about you okay! I dont want to hurt you" he said and i felt like someone was squeezing my heart.

"What do you want from me Blake?" I asked him clearly confused. If he doesnt want to date me, then what does he want from me?

"I want us to talk like norma people do. Ignoring eachother would get us nowhere" he said and i let out a sigh.

This guy os so damn confusing!

"Okay... so want to be friedns with me?" I asked and he nodded.

"We cant be friends" i said coldly.