CHAPTER 4

I woke up pretty early with my clothes from yesterday on but I was covered. I guess mom came to check on me before she went to bed. I got off the bed and took off my clothes, then I headed to the bathroom. I let the water run down on me with its comforting warmth and soothing movement. Then the crucial memories of yesterday came rushing back in.

I saw Veronica lying in the hospital bed and I started to wonder. What if she wasn’t going to wake up ever again? What would I do? Honestly, I didn’t have an answer for that and I hoped it wouldn’t come to that because there was no doubt that I would go crazy. Completely crazy. I pushed the thought away and tried to take a decent shower. But that was slightly impossible because I couldn’t stop thinking about everything. I forgot about time and sat at the bottom of the bathroom and let the water keep running over me.

I went back to things which drove me crazy, school. Just thinking about how I was going to be the talk of the day yet again, not in a good way. And this time I was sure there was no allies left for me. Because even the ones who had doubts, now they had proof that there was something seriously wrong with me.

I never knew school could turn out to be hell. Before all this happened I used to love school very much, and I enjoyed keeping my grades up. But now it was a whole different story. In short I didn’t want to disappoint my mother and that was the whole point of going to school.

But it was a big torture for me. I was so fed up with all the staring and the glaring. I was not an alien for crying out loud. I was just a boy whose life was messed up and keep getting worse each day, that’s all. And I was looking for answers like everyone else.

Answers, what answers? Because I didn’t even know what to ask. Should I ask if it was possible that I killed all these people subconsciously without me knowing? But how? Or should I ask a police question, do I have any enemies or enemy who would want to harm me, but kills other people to torture me emotionally? Even if that was the point, why wouldn’t that person come after my family, my mother and Ashley?

All these questions didn’t make a nick sense. If it was me killing them subconsciously my mind would’ve had some glimpse of memories and I would’ve used some kind of weapons. But these people weren’t even touched when they were examined. Second question, I never had any enemies, maybe Bratton, but he was not capable of such thing. Bratton was a douche bag from school who wouldn’t leave me in peace. Besides I could hardly call him my enemy, he was just a spoiled brat who thought that he was stronger than everyone. And evil was not in him, he wasn’t capable of being that cruel.

Without realizing I found myself sitting there for a long time. Until I heard someone getting in my room without knocking. I automatically knew it was Ashley. Quickly I snapped out of it and rushed to my room to get some clothes.

“Oh brother, will you ever change!” Ashley wondered her face filled with concern,

“Why would I want to change?” I asked not quiet getting what she meant.

“You take shower longer than anyone I’ve ever come across, not even girls take shower that long.” She was right, I took shower longer than anyone in our family. It was a good thing everyone had their own shower in their bedrooms. I took long showers because they helped me think and figure things out. But I haven’t succeeded so far. I was right where I started. Ashley never seemed annoyed with me taking long showers though, she was rather amused by it,

“Get ready or we might end up being late for school.” She ordered,

Then she headed out of the room. I threw the towel to my bed and I put on my boxer, then I picked some random blue draft shirt and black jeans, then I slid on my sneakers. I took my bag which was beside the table. My bed room table which I put my laptop and do my homework, like a middle size office table. I made sure that the bag had everything I needed and hurried downstairs. Looking at the time I didn’t have much time. So I tried to leave without having breakfast. I moved as quietly as I could towards the door which was just couple feet away from the stairs.

While holding my breath I started to take steps towards the door very, very cautiously. And for a moment I thought I managed to ditch mom from noticing, but then the door disappointed me. When I pulled the door knob to open it, it squeaked. As usual, almost instantly I heard my mom calling,

“Steven honey, come and have breakfast, I already prepared something for you.” Her soft musical voice coming from the kitchen sounded calm, “I never understand why you always want to skip breakfast.”

I started breathing again allowing my lungs to start working. I shrugged as I was heading to the kitchen which was on the right side from the door,

“Because mom, I don’t want to be late for school.” I mumbled frowning because of the miserable failure. Not that I minded being late for school, I did it for Ashley. Most of the time I made sure we got there just a short time before the bell rang so that Ashley wouldn’t be so angry. She hated being late.

“Well, you wouldn’t be so late if you didn’t take those long showers of yours.” She didn’t look at me, she took a glass from the cupboard and poured some juice for me; she already prepared some pancakes and eggs on a plate, she handed the juice to me, “Bonne appétit,” there was no way I could refuse it. She smiled after seeing me all uncomfortable and annoyed.

I knew why she smiled, it was because I was angry. So she smiled for me to respond that I won’t be angry any longer. I gave her a very weak smile but she was satisfied and went to her room to get ready for work. Ashley was going to rip my head off.

Quickly I forced everything into my mouth and drank the juice. Thank god mom wasn’t around to see it, because she would’ve gotten really mad. She never like inappropriate attitudes, but I had to do it.

I left the kitchen soon after finishing and headed to the garage to get my car. But there I found Ashley waiting inside super angry. Worry hit me and I started to look for an excuse. But up to this point I was sure that I already used them all.

“What took you so long?” she blurted out when I got in and she was angry as a bull.

Honestly, I didn’t have any excuse this time. I started the car thinking what I was going to say. And sadly enough, nothing came up and a simple sorry wasn’t enough anymore. For I’d said it too many times already.

School wasn’t that close to home so it required some driving. After couple miles I couldn’t take seeing her angry at me like that while she was the only friend I was left with. I know she was my sister, but she was also my only friend. We had a very close relationship.

“I’m sorry for making you wait for so long, I promise I won’t do it again.” I pleaded and put on two sweet puppy eyes hoping she would fall for it. But she shrugged and look out the window on her side.

“Ash please.” I tried to be honest but she didn’t move, and her expression became even grimmer.

“Don’t call me Ash,” she muttered in between her teeth, revealing her rage.

“Okay, I won’t, but you have to forgive me. I will kneel right now if you want, just so that you can forgive me.” I left the steering and started releasing my seatbelt so that I would kneel on the seat while the car was moving.

“Okay, okay, okay I forgive you. I don’t want to cause an accident.” She snapped at me while trying to hold the steering wheel. I knew she would do that.

A wide smile formed on my face when I heard her saying those words. She smiled back with irritation because she knew it wouldn’t take long for her to forgive me.

“Thanks Ash.” I muttered softly with a grin.

She rolled her eyes accepting defeat and sighed, “Whatever.”

That’s the good thing about her, she was never stubborn when it comes to forgiving me. I guess that was the reason we were so close. But on the other hand we had to, we had the coolest mother in the whole world and there was only the two of us.

Well, my family was made of three people; mom, my little sister Ashley, and myself. I was adopted when I was very little, even before Ashley was born, and so mom and Ashley were the only people I’ve known my whole life. Mom’s name was Eliza and she worked at a loan company, she was the CEO. We were pretty rich.

When we were growing up, mom taught us to love and care for each other, and she never allowed us to fight or argue. Being raised like that, we automatically became friends. Even though I was the one with many mistakes. She always managed to make Ashley forgive and it was that way until now I was seventeen.

I was thankful that I was adopted with such a good person. Even though I didn’t know what happened to my parents, other than knowing they died when I was very little. But that didn’t really matter now. I already had a family, Ashley and mom.

She treated me in the best way, I couldn’t ask for a better mother than her or for a better sister than Ashley. I was so much contented with my life. Even though the world around me saw me as a monster of some kind, I still felt relief that I had people I could rely on. People who never saw me as a monster.

We arrived at school and few people were rushing inside, which meant we were almost late. Abruptly Ashley got out and left me alone inside. Which was a sign that she was still angry at me. The good thing was that were not that late yet. She could still get in class in time. As for me, it was my junior year, but still felt like freshmen because I was a total stranger. As usual I went to my locker and waited until the bell rang, so that people wouldn’t have time to discuss me, right on my face. The one thing I hated the most.

I went to class and through all the periods I had glares and staring. There was no side that I would look and not find a set of eyes looking at me. The only question I could ask myself was what the hell was going on today? I knew Veronica was in the hospital and, as usual everybody thought it was because of me. But why was everyone acting like they’d seen their worst nightmare when they looked at me! Did I look weirder than other days or what? I always asked myself all these sorts of questions and sadly I couldn’t find any answers.

And in my stupid attempt to look for answers I found myself even more stupid by going to the restroom and look at myself, if there was anything strange about my face. But I was dumbfounded when I saw nothing changed. I had same dark hair, brown eyes, long jaw lines and cheekbones with heavy eyebrows, and I had full pouty lips.

Suddenly, I moved away from the mirror until I hit a stall door. I felt like I was going crazy. After realizing what I was actually doing, and how things were. Everything was going wrong and I didn’t even know why. Right at that moment the bell rang, which was a sign that it was lunch time and that I missed third period. Mr. Gilbert, my math teacher never liked me anyway, I bet he was relieved that I didn’t attend in his class.

I had to get out of there before people started charging in and mock me. Another place not so good to be in when I was in school, the restrooms. There was few people who didn’t pay attention to me, but most did and they always offended me in there. So if I wanted to be safe I had to be out of the restrooms before anyone came in especially Bratton. He hated me the most and with his friends to find me in here he would probably give me a black eye. I never really knew why he hated me so much anyway.

I got out and bumped into couple students who avoided any contact with me. They made a way as I was passing through the hallway while murmuring to each other some things. I wish I could hear what they were murmuring about, I wish I could know what everybody was thinking of me now. What other news came that made them so cold to me this time around? I had nobody to ask, so I went to the cafeteria to get my lunch and acted like nothing had changed. At the counter nobody wanted to be close to me, it was like I had this disease and everybody thought I would infect them or something.

And since the line broke the second I joined it, I had an advantage to get food quicker than everybody else. I went to the abandoned table; this table was on the right side at the end of the cafeteria, right at the corner. It was left there for me when everything started to change. It is funny how somebody’s life can take a turn so quickly. This table used to be full with people, my friends, but now it was empty and it was just as cast out as I was. I sat there and started to eat my apple when somebody sat across. I was looking strictly on my plate, so that I won’t have to see any angry eyes staring at me. However, I had to know who would dare sit with me. Who was not afraid of being near me?

I could’ve said it was Ashley but I forbid her to try to protect me all the time. So I told her to act like everybody else so that she could have a normal life. At least one of us could get to live. And as long as I knew she was on my side it didn’t matter if people thought she hated me as well. The important thing was, I get to be the weirdo and she get to be the cool girl so that we wouldn’t have to suffer the same fate. Even though at first she insisted that she didn’t care what other people said and she was ready to stick with me. I managed to convince her that it wouldn’t do me any good seeing her suffer because of me. So she stayed with her sophomore friends and I stuck with my problems.

I raised my eyes only to see the cute blonde girl from yesterday, and as soon as our eyes met she smiled widely. I wished I could return it but instead I just grimaced. Because I knew it was just a typical teenage girl looking for adventure of some kind, trying to prove some kind of theory she had in her tiny mind.

One thing she forgot was that my life was not some sort of game. People died around me and if she was trying to prove that she would certainly die just like everybody else. But now I was aware and I was not going to let her put her life on the line because she felt like it. She could go try some bunch jumping or sky diving or whatever life threatening adventure she wanted, but not through me. I’d seen too many people die because of me and I would not add another naïve teenage girl on the list.

I looked at her plainly, not wanting to show her any interest at all. Under normal circumstances I would’ve liked her. She was totally the kind of girl I would like, she had cute blues eyes, long eyelashes and little chubby cheeks; she had full lips with slightly red color. And from the look of her figure she wasn’t that tall, maybe five feet and couple inches. And I liked her teeth the most, they were tiny but very well arranged, and that made her look even cuter when she smiled.